That Love and Fucking Thing


And each morning I wake up,
A bruise and a shift of the sky,
Covering you.

Wondering whether to stay or go.
You are talking with your friend,
That we fucked last night,
Your words traveling like something warm to eat in the morning,
The steam rising and I can’t join in,
I feel left out; a problem with threesomes.
And I feel left out without knowing the context of each vowel,
All local gossip, and I am from 600 miles away.

She leaves the room, the house,
And we are two lovers discussing.
Murmuring words, slippery sounds,
I’m not so unhappy with it,
Not so alone in some corner in another universe with no stars,
But there is a point where we need planning,
And that time was 96 hours ago.

Later you ask me how that love and fucking thing is working for me;
Nothing is different,
I still wake up and eye you warily,
You lie, but you call it selective,
You fuck me sometimes tenderly and sometimes not,
Your actions are of love, or maybe practiced seduction,
I can’t tell which….and does it matter?

The difference between love and seduction is blurred,
Like a line of trees through a car window,
The tall poplars a flurry of speckled trunks.
Your caresses and gifts say,
That you have done this before to get through an opening in the heart,
To travel through some landscape where fucking becomes bigger,
Does it matter what your impetus is?

The last day here, I wake up,
A bruise and a shift of the sky,
Covering us.
Wondering whether to stay or go.
Your mouth opens,
Words rising in the good-bye air,
Settling over my bruised flesh,
My ass and thighs, a tender expanse of marks,
The story of the collision of love and fucking.

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About Avery Cassell

Avery Cassell is a genderqueer San Francisco writer, poet, cartoonist, and artist who grew up in Iran. They live with their Maine Coon cat, Lulu, and bake yeasted waffles every Sunday morning. Behrouz Gets Lucky is their first novel. You can find their erotic short stories sprinkled in various anthologies, including Best Lesbian Erotica 2015 and Sex Still Spoken Here. Avery is currently working on a book of more of Behrouz and Lucky's shenanigans, a memoir, and an illustrated early reader children's book about a eight year old transgender boy and his family.
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2 Responses to That Love and Fucking Thing

  1. Bryan Borland says:

    Fan-fucking-tastic.

    “The story of the collision of love and fucking.”

    Love it.

    Yeah, 3-ways typically suck.

    Like

  2. Birdie says:

    Thanks, three-ways are a sexual adventure at best, and an emotional land-mine at worst. This was in between the two. Hey, you should visit San Francisco to read your work!

    Like

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